Waiting To Wed – Is it a forgotten concept?

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Waiting To Wed – Is it a forgotten concept?

Article and Interview by Valencia King 

Well, seeing as how the 10 females I knew who were all members of the “V Card Club” (Virgins) are no longer members…as a matter of fact, that club has now lost all but two of its members.  And yes, I am one of the two remaining virgins.  This decrease in the numbers just based off of my friends leads me to believe that the idea of Waiting To Wed is certainly endangered but not yet extinct.  

 In my generation of Young Millennials the “short term hookup” is the road most people take but they don’t want it to be their final destination.  In fact, the vast majority of my friends and colleagues want to get married – some day.  They just want to have fun until they find who they consider the “Right One.” 

 With that being said, marriage in itself is still highly respected among my generation – including the concept of waiting to wed.  For example, take Chart Topping Singer Ciara and NFL Seattle Seahawks Champion Russell Wilson.  This celebrity couple took it upon themselves to share with the media and world that they are abstaining from sex in their relationship for when and if it leads to marriage. 

During an interview with Pastor Miles McPherson at San Diego’s Rock Church, Russell Wilson was quoted saying:

“I said to her – and she completely agreed – ‘Can we love each other without that?’ …If you can love somebody without that, then you can really love somebody.” 


The article continues and I find it humorous and sincere when Russell Wilson goes on to say: 


”I ain’t gonna lie – I need ya’ll to pray for us. Because I know you have seen her on the screen now. If there’s a 10, she’s a 15… Pray for me, keep my mind clear, keep my heart clear.”

 “Social media affects the culture”

  It’s been reported that even Ciara herself found out about Russell Wilson’s comments through her mentions on Twitter. 

 This brought a frenzy of questions out to the public eye. 

 “Why would he wait if she’s already got a kid?”
  Ciara didn’t make Future, her baby’s father wait, so why now?

 Social media took all of these questions and ran their tabloids: 

“Could Ciara keep Russell from another championship?!” 

 “No Sex Before Marriage”

“Ciara and Russell are abstaining from sex until marriage”

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Social Media plays a huge role in the concept of Waiting to Wed.  It gives life to the concept of waiting to wed yet it sheds light on how fewer people are actually waiting.  To help us understand the social media side is Christen O’Neal, Founder of Loc & Key – Keep It On Loc. 

Q: Does social media make it more difficult to 1. Wait to Wed and 2. Be vocal about it?
A: “It definitely makes it more difficult or not the popular decision. Which is one of the things that we are trying to combat with Loc and Key.  We really want to see a social media take over! One of our agendas is to get as many people that are subscribing to the website to get them in our “I Pledge Purity” Tee & get everybody taking pictures in the T-Shirts to basically say –  not only is it relevant but its right!…Ultimately social media effects the culture”

My generation is stuck in a culture that tells them to do one thing and immediately condemns them for doing it their way.

Make the Decision is yours

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 I have made the decision to carry the torch of keeping hope alive that waiting to wed is not a forgotten concept.  For me it’s NOT about waiting for a knight and shining armor to rescue me or romantically take me away. 

It’s a choice, a life style that I have made for myself.  To love, honor and respect my virtue.  I carry my torch so that I am able to help you light your torch, in hopes that you will soon help someone else light theirs – because it’s a light that shines like non-other. 

Published in GLORY Magazine Winter 2015 Edition 

For more information on Spoken Like A Virgin: Waiting to Wed email info@valenciaking.com 

Follow Valencia @IAmValenciaKing 

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Carrie Movie Review

She’s backkkk!!! The 1976 supernatural horror film makes a comeback, revamped, re-scary (is that a word?) and of course more Carrie!! Chloe Grace Mortez graces us with her Kick-Ass presence only to whoop some of it in this movie too. You get to see what happens when someone decides to bully a shy girl who is secretly telekinetic. I found myself rooting her on by the end of the movie. The bullying was unbearable and if you didn’t take bullying serious prior to this movie, you will after. This Halloween you will know her name.

Mega Fest 2013 (Dallas, Texas)

Mega Fest Day 1 – Part 1:

For the first time Dallas, Texas got the opportunity to experience the joy, energy and honor of hosting MegaFest.  MegaFest is a family-friendly festival which brings together the best of Bishop T.D. Jakes Ministries events including Woman Thou Art Loosed; ManPower, MegaKidz, MegaYouth, Empowerment Sessions, Inspirational Speakers and Live Entertainment.   Yes, Bishop T.D. Jakes and the city of Dallas, Texas pulled this awesome event off in 3-Days with 3-Locations (Dallas Convention Center, American Airline Center and the Omni Dallas Hotel).

Over 75,000 men, woman and children participated in the fun filled events.  From session to session participant left feeling encourage, empowered and inspired to be “Together Again.”

The festival started with a live taping of Oprah Winfrey’s Lifeclass as thousands of participants filled the American Airline Center seeking knowledge on how to connect and stay connected to the people who mean the most to you, FAMILY.  I got an opportunity to interview … outside of American Airline Center immediate after he appeared on Ophrah’s  Lifeclass …. vidoe coming soon!!!  All I can say is WOW what a powerful message Mr. Brad received from Bishp T.D. Jakes and Oprah Whinfrey as he received his “Aha moment” about reconnecting with his father.

From there the KKVI & Real Talk Radio Team experienced the strength and voice of Tamela Mann during Woman Thou Art Loosed. Our very own Trina May said, “Tamela made it possible for every woman, man and child in that building feel their breakthrough. It was such a presence that even after the event many couldn’t shake the powerful feeling of something shifting.”